I have very mixed feelings about this place. It’s the closest cafe to my house, so it’s my go-to caffeine venue. I’ve also eaten some  decent meals in my time there. There is something a bit disjointed about the vibe though; it’s a knife shop as well as a cafe, and the chi of the entire place is kind of off. As a result, it’s become the CBF place, rather than the ‘this place is definitely awesome’ place.

This is Thomas ^^

This place has some pretty funky decor that reminds me of my grandma’s old house in the country. I enjoy the clocks and chequered tiles. I didn’t enjoy my food though.

Disclaimer: I was hungover as fuck when I visited this place. Usually when you’re hungover, things aren’t that awesome. I was stuck in that limbo where eating is the most repulsive thing imaginable, but would also be the only thing to perk me up. And I probably ordered the worst thing for a hangover- a dodgy omelette.

I enjoyed the toast.

I had to walk all of 5min to get to this place, and god damn I was feeling sorry for myself. My soy-chai latte was decent enough to bother paying for, but I’ve always found the service a bit awkward, like I’m interrupting the wait staff’s happy-friendship-hangtimes just  to order some sub-par eggs. The highlight of this meal was the soggy toast that was kind to my stomach. Thankfully Thomas could finish off the tragic remains of this meal, so it didn’t go entirely to waste.

Occupie Metrics:
Door to Beard Index: I wouldn’t call this place entirely ‘hip’. It’s an at-times-kinda-ok cafe that happens to be on Wellington St. DTB index is low.

Coffee: Their coffee  doesn’t suck.

Noms: They do a haloumi salad that seems decent. However my noms experience was not kind.

How poor will it make me? The quality-cost ratio is off. Just stick to the caffeine and you won’t be as disappointed.

Final thoughts: I do feel I’m being overly harsh, but my experiences here have always been ‘ok’, or ‘I just want coffee now’. Urban Spoon rates them 73% positive. I’d say that’s accurate.

-Madeline

I’ve decided to create an #OccupieFitzroy hall of fame. Bluebird Espresso will be in it.

This place is little, and easy to miss. It’s down the dodgy end of Johnston St (near my house), nestled amongst a sleazy backpackers hostel and some tiling stores. For anyone that knows Johnston St, if you’re not on your way to the Convent then this is the place to start giving up. Unless you’re going to Bluebird of course.

To begin, I ordered a coffee and it came out almost cold. Well, cold for my standards. But I was here for my regular Friday morning brunch, so I was happy to take it easy and see how it went. The menu looked amazing, and there were some really incredible vegetarian options (which can sometimes compensate for cold coffee).

I ordered garlic butter mushrooms on on cheesy potato puree, with poached eggs and roquette on toast. All of a sudden I didn’t give a fuck about the cold coffee because I had died and gone to heaven. This meal was like sex. On toast. With some sunshine and rainbows. I still dream about it, and I would happily drink all the cold coffee in Melbourne if it meant I could eat this more often.

This was my meal, midway through. Note how delicious it still looks.

I’m not usually one to order sweet breakfasts, but Chloe always does. She ordered French Toast. I can’t remember exactly what was in it other than salted caramel somethingarather, and some banana. But it looked fucking tits. Again, didn’t give a fuck about the cold coffee. This was just too good.

Again, take note of the half eaten meal and how fucking appetising it still looks.

Occupie Metrics:
Door to Beard Index: This place is still in the ‘I knew about Bluebird before it was cool’ phase. The dodgy end of Johnston St is quickly becoming less dodgy, but Bluebird is still in its ‘not too cool’ phase. It’s always busy on weekends, and it’s full of hipsters. Therefore, beards. I rate it: 1 step.

Coffee: Would be good if it was warmer, but Chloe didn’t mind it so much. I wouldn’t go here *just* for the coffee, considering how much great coffee there is in the area.

Noms: FUCKING INCREDIBLE, HOLY JESUS. EAT IT NOW.

How poor will it make me? Normal Fitzroy/Collingwood poor, and a bit too poor considering it’s the dodgy end of Johnston St.

Final thoughts: This place is a big deal: I could forget about the less-than-average coffee because their food was just so, incredibly tops. Urban Spoon rates them at 4.5 starts. I would rate them 9 if I could (10 if they did hot coffee).

Check out their Facebook.  Fall in love with Bluebird Espresso.

-Mads